We can’t always get away on vacation when we need to, here are ten ideas to help you:
Photo by H. Cowper Flickr 3743152334_bb56fab422_z
- Spruce up your home or office so that it makes you happy. If you already have photos of family, change them out, because eventually those photos are like wallpaper and you won’t see them. If you have toys on your desk, change those out, too, for the same reason. Hang something colorful on your cubicle or office wall, maybe a quilt or abstract piece of embroidery from someplace like Guatemala, but not an “encouragement poster.” Those will just make you cynical after a while.
- Express gratitude for all that you have. You may not be able to afford a vacation right now, but can you get away to a coffee shop one afternoon with a friend? Do you have groceries in the refrigerator, a roof over your head, a sense of safety and being at peace when home? If you write down both what you are grateful for, and what you did to make it happen, you are also simultaneously building your confidence.
- If there is someone you should thank, a spouse that picked up dry cleaning, a child that made dinner without you asking, express your thanks aloud and see their joy. Positivity lights up mirror neurons and helps you feel good, too. Definitely a momentary diversion from the daily grind.
- Schedule a massage or some other form of self-care that you enjoy. An hour on the table when you cannot do anything else is a wonderful break from the demands of daily life. Call your local vocational and massage schools to see if they have especially low prices if you are willing to let a student practice on you. Listen to music you like, take a yoga class or engage in some other form of exercise. Or spend just one day at a water park with a friend or family because social engagement is also a form of self-care.
- Do a mindfulness meditation. Research shows as little as 10 minutes a day can start impacting your ability to cope more resiliently within a few weeks. Sit up straight, concentrate on your breathing, (in-out, in-out) and pay attention to the sensations in your body. If you become distracted, simply bring your focus back to your breath. Some people find it helps to focus on an item, like a candle flame, but it is not necessary. If you want to add a sense of helping the wider world, you can go to the Buddhist practice of tonglen: breathe in the pain for all the sentient beings in your situation, and breathe out peace.
- Learn to identify your own emotional triggers. Are you getting upset because everyone else (it seems) can afford to get away? Try thinking about exactly what getting away represents to you: Is it freedom? Having enough money? Available time? If it is one of these, what small thing can you do that will make you feel more free, like taking a hike nearby? If it’s more money, can you create a “playtime” account for next year’s vacation? If it’s more time, are there small things you enjoy that you haven’t done lately, like knitting a sweater, reading a novel, painting a picture? Doing any one of these things will help you feel like you have had a break.
- Be compassionate with yourself. Empathy for others is grand, but don’t neglect yourself in the process. Dr. Kristin Neff, Associate Professor of Human Development at the University of Texas who pioneered research on self-compassion has an autistic son. When he had “fits” in the grocery store, she reminded herself to practice kindness to herself, by practicing her own mantra “this is a moment of suffering and it will pass.” If you want to know how compassionate you are with yourself, take her test here:
http://self-compassion.org/test-your-self-compassion-level.html
If you are wondering how in the world this connects to not being able to go on vacation, it’s because being kind to yourself helps reduce the stress of daily life.
- Hug yourself. The physical sensation will be comforting to your body and therefore your mind—a handy trick when you can’t leave the office, or are up against a writing deadline, or caretaking someone else.
- Give yourself a technology holiday on the weekends or whenever you are not at work. Turn the ringers off your phone, don’t look at email, step away from that computer! Skip the news and other “feel bad” items. Leave the bills unopened until a set time when you plan to pay them. Take off your watch, leave your phone inside, and sit outside in the backyard watching the birds without knowing the time. No working from home!
- Find a local festival to attend: there are more than you can ever imagine, and many are free to enter. From arts to farmer’s markets, check out what’s local that you would enjoy, and take a day off to enjoy it. Even better if it happens to be outside of the 20-mile radius you most likely traverse on a regular basis to give you that sense of getting away.
